Yoga and Breakup
“Down dog! Sit! Stay! That’s how most of us feel about our thoughts and feelings after a breakup. We’d much rather lay on the sofa and look at yoga poses much less do them. But, here’s the thing, in order to be able to eat, sleep, and function like a sane human you have to “get on the mat”.
Before we talk about exactly what poses you need to do in order to get immediate relief from you breakup, I want to talk to you about yoga.
The west got it’s grips on yoga back in the 1920’s when Paramahansa Yogananda came to the US and founded the Self-realization Center, in Encinitas, California. Yoga wasn’t about “cute butts” and lululemon pants back then. And the type of yoga you will be doing to heal isn’t about that now either. It’s a spiritual path.
Yoga means to “yoke together” mind, body, and soul. The moment that yoga stops being just exercise and starts being the sum of your parts is when you have to bring dedicated attention to the details of the practice such as how you splay your fingers, the quality of your breath, the nuance of each movement from one pose to the next.
One focused sun salutation can take up to twenty-minutes if all the parts of the movement are slowed down and connected to fully. It removes us from the hurried pace of taking the magnificent animal that is our body for granted. Just ten seconds of uninterrupted attention shifts the chemistry of our body from reactive to receptive.
And for you to get through the fucking torment of your breakup you are going to need to be receptive. In fact, if you aren’t you will make false judgments and conclusions that result in dysfunctional behavior. I know the goddamn articles online talking to you about “loving yourself” or “using your breakup to become better.”
Listen, we all suck and we all are gods. You don’t need to “become better.” What is required now is awareness. That awareness will be curated and incorporated in your life though yoga. It doesn’t matter how much or how little you know about yoga because every time you practice that is a new experience that demands your full awareness.
So, the first thing I’m going to have you do is to breathe deep. This is the foundation of yoga—the breath.
Pranayama is the formal practice of controlling the breath, which is the source of our prana, or vital life force.
Begin with three-part breath.
- Sit up with an erect spine (I also laugh when I read the word erect).
- Roll your shoulders down and back opening up your chest a bit.
- Now inhale feeling your belly push out (The beer belly look on purpose).
- Then feel your ribs expand while your chest rises.
- This breath will drag along the back of your throat and through your sinus passages, which makes it sound a bit like waves.
- If you are confused watch this video I googled to do it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kwFy62iU5uE
Okay, if you did this for even 3 minutes you can be done for the day and go back to your self-loathing. Or you can dive a little deeper and practice Maitri.
Maitri is a type of loving-kindness meditation. In fact you don’t even have to practice it right away. You can just take five minutes to watch Pema Chödrön explaining it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xiLH6es4_d8
That can be enough for today as long as you commit to do this every day. You commit to practice attention to your breath and Maitri. I taught yoga for 3 years. So, if you want deeper guidance into the practice one pose at a time, one principal at a time, and one moment at a time please reach out to me to set up a consultation.
Also, I’ve requested various yoga studios and teachers leave their comments below so that you can choose a studio near you and use yoga to navigate your breakup.
I love you so much dear soul. You belong here. Your continued breath is proof of that. Tend to it and it will give you gifts you never thought were possible.
I also encourage you to join my email list so that you can get tips on how to use yoga to heal your breakup and many other amazing tools that provide you with immediate relief as well as the ability to turn your pain into power.