Bringing Peace to Your Life: Coping with suicide
Suicide is a serious topic. Death is not. Death is something we are all going to experience. According to thermodynamics and the stuff Einstein postulated we are just going to change the form of energy we are in; from tangible to intangible. Speaking of energy, I’m really tired today. I’m the kind of tired that happens when the caffeine wears off and about 6 months of stress starts to set in. Sometimes I like to call this tailspin tired, because my self-care goes to shit. The time I do spend in bed I feel guilty for because I could be doing something that is advancing my mission of making six-figures and be a global leader. I have to fake caring about humans when I’m this tired. And that’s pretty much what adulthood is, you are tired and a puppet to various substances to control your mood. Further, as an adult you are tired because the bliss of ignorance and wonderment that came as a buffer to the outerworld in childhood has totally worn off. In fact, many of us are in therapy to deal with the shocking awareness that our childhood was full of abusive or neglectful authority figures. That’s just the baseline of what we have to negotiate in adulthood. Then add onto it the fact we don’t die in our thirties due to plague anymore. Some of us live into our 80’s. Eighty years of life is long and redundant. And within that timespan some of us start families. Families! The nerve. Families are like a petri dish for dysfunction. Yet, every day, someone gets pregnant and then attempts to impart sub-par survival skills to their offspring. Then those children grow up and commit suicide; sometimes as young as 8 years old. There is no one reason why a person takes their own life. However, thematically speaking, despondency or disillusionment are often the underpinning energies that justify the act. It’s a right we are all given once we develop into a place of metacognition--being aware of ourselves. We, at any moment, can bring a halt to our bodies aliveness and choose to die. Some people get really up in arms about suicide and deem it a sin. I feel neutral about it. In fact, I consider killing myself about once a month for various reasons--mostly because my vision for a better future becomes marred with images of destitution. Sometimes I will feel suicidal because I have to do laundry--again. Other times I will want off this planet because the gap between what I want and getting it seems insurmountable. And then there are those moments where I’ve completely depleted myself by trying to give others what I need in an attempt to experience reciprocity. That cycle is a real black hole. Thinking about ending your life is natural; even philosophical. However, as a species it seems we share a collective understanding that bringing an intentional end to one’s life violates the laws of nature. We are supposed to let disease take us instead or some other random act of violence that eviscerates us from the face of the planet will be the thing that ends us. The real intellectual quandary is that sorrow and anger always seems be the experience of those who are in the line of suicide; meaning they are the ones who lost a loved one that died on purpose. So now, imagine, an adult with all the adult pressures being compounded by the unbearable pain of sorrow and anger. Their mind has to do some form of acrobatics to rectify the injustice that they must go on living while their loved one has simply chosen to exit life. This process of rectification often is experienced as guilt echoed in the phrase, “If only I would have known, I could have done something.” It’s rare you can convince a person to do anything once they have committed their mind towards something. In this case, most people feel great relief once they have chosen to “end things”. But, then there are those individuals who don’t want to die. They want the experience of death without bringing an end to the life in their body. Addiction is a type of ambivalent suicide. And I only bring this up to say there are degrees to which we begin to die before we start to truly live. The erosion of the soul happens to be the path to such a life. So how do we bring peace to our lives in the face of such difficulties? We let things die like old worn out attachments. We reconcile past hurts. We actively participate in forgiveness. We fully participate in the grief process. We devote ourselves to spiritual practice that reinforces non-judgement. There are so many things that activate peace in our lives. But, for the sake of this conversation let’s elaborate on the items I just listed. Let Attachments Die Nature is full of cycles and rhythms. We are not meant to stay children forever. We are not supposed to cling to our youth. Rather, we continue to grow and evolve. But the “stuckness” every life-coach on the face of the earth is working to solve comes from an adaptation to feeling comfortable in “what we know.” The distillation of Buddhist teachings refers to this as grasping. We hold tightly to ideas in a way that defines our limitations. Then we begin to romanticize those limitations as wishes that are on the precipice of being realized if we just give them a little more of our time and life-force energy. Let Them Die That is the natural way of things. We all must experience seasons of our lives and relationships. We all must embrace winter as a time of internal reflection and spring as a time to weed the garden. So, the first step of bringing peace to your life, especially when if you are in the line of suicide, is to experience it as a season of your life that carries the promise of transformation in it. Reconcile Past Hurts. When we focus more on what we gained more than what we lost, reconciliation can begin. I mean, that sentence would make a good meme. But, the reality is we want to lose weight, gain friends, lose pain, and gain pleasure. So loss and gain are relative. So are the things that hurt us because sure as night follows day, when we endeavor to understand why we hurt we not only heal, we become more skilled at existence. We become more nimble and less encumbered by seeking justice for wrongs. Instead, when we reconcile past hurts, it is often through the mechanism of realizing that we have been the recipient of hurt as well as the perpetrator of it. The score card gets thrown away in favor of offering ourselves and others grace. And when suicide is the source of hurt, it can be reconciled through compassion and recognition that just as there are many ways to live so to are there many ways to die. Participate in Forgiveness Forgiveness, like love, is a verb. The essence of it is acceptance that the past is unchangeable but the relationship we have with the past is malleable. In fact, beyond forgiveness is blessing all that was, is, and will be. For all things can be transformed into good. Devote Ourselves to a Spiritual Process There is an element of life that defies logic and spirituality resides there. My sense of having a spiritual practice is engaging in being defined by no-thing. There are different pathways such as prayer or meditation that facilitate that experience. But, it has to be intentional. And when we allow ourselves to melt into the universe, some part of us can feel a connection with those that end their lives. We can offer them sacred space within our practice. Peace is not a static state. Like all of life it ebbs and flows like the tides. Bringing peace to our lives is an active practice. It requires attention and intention. There’s so much more I can say, but I’m tired. But what I will close this article with is that it’s up to you to live your life above the noise of pressure. It’s up to you to gain the skills to bring peace to your life. It’s up to you to practice forgiveness. And it’s up to you to not let the suicide of someone you love also take your life. I'M HERE TO HELP YOU.
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"Grief does not cause pain, it clears it."
When my clients choose to work with me, they step over the first threshold that has all of us in its grips--survival. Finances cause many of us undo stresses. We worry about our bills being paid, if our jobs are a waste of our time, and we long for wealth, abundance, and prosperity as the keys to freedom. Of course, there are other aspects of life that bring us grief such as divorce, the loss of a loved one or pet, and feeling like we don't belong on earth. Financial stress and the stress that arises after we experience a loss have one thing in common and that is that both of them trigger our survival instincts. We loose sight of what matters and spiral out of control. Some people start drinking more to numb the pain. Others double down on their dysfunctional habits. Most of us cling to the painful past because it's familiar an a little less frightening than the unknown future. What we don't realize is that the process of grief is our ally and not our enemy. It helps us remove what no longer serves us. It loosens our worn out attachments. It helps us reflect on how we are living our lives and how we want to be living our lives. My parents have been dead for half of my life. And honestly, after all this time, I'm glad they died legends in their 50's. They didn't die while living and leave me to care for rotting bodies with tempestuous souls. In fact, as time has passed, their death has taught me to live. But, I've had to grieve first. I gave my 30's to the grief process. At first I tried to escape it as most of us do. I drank a little, then I immersed myself in my Masters program, and then I tried to date someone who was more of a poison than medicine. Grief has also healed that relationship because after 7 years apart from one another and me using our breakup to fuel me becoming the author of Breakup Rehab, we reunited as comrades. He spent the night with me. We made out. He let me know what I taught him. And the cycle completed with a sense of fondness between us. In fact, grief is a cycle as well as a process. The gift of grief is that it results in acceptance, which is synonymous with forgiveness. We let ourselves have the experience of life without judging it. And in time, we begin to notice that grief is a visitor that comes to clean up our lives. It is there to clear the clutter and create fresh soil for new dreams to germinate and blossom. However, when we are in pain, the chances of us fully processing our grief are slim. That is why you hire me. You hire someone who has walked the path, knows the tools, and can teach you exactly what you need so that you can experience the freedom on the other side of grief. I offer my clients a very specific and tailored education. Henceforth, I require a tuition fee of $9000/6 month or $1500/month to be your professor and impart all the knowledge and wisdom required to live a happy and healthy life. It's the best money you will ever spend because you will be getting an education on embracing freedom and living the life you want to live before you die! We all want to feel "good". So why does feeling lonely feel so "bad"? Let's walk through the sequence of events that results in the feeling of being lonely.
Loneliness is rooted in us facing ourselves. We are searching for something permanent; some reassurance that our life is valid. And our self-concept is derived from our interactions with others. We require reflection to determine if our life is indeed valid. So, when we experience loneliness we are facing impermanence. We are staring into the void. The vastness of our souls as connected to infinite time and space are juxtaposition to the mortal body we inhabit. In fact, many of us choose to live between worlds by using substances that numb our bodies. We are attempting to make the limitations of the flesh diffuse. So, we smoke, drink, and manipulate our nervous system with food and drugs. Our orgasms often ride the edges of trading bliss for injury. That is to say, we give of our life force in order to feel vital. It's the great paradox. So, loneliness is a symptom of an existential awakening. It's aches. And if we place ourselves in the witness seat, we observe our impulses, we will become aware of how we react to pain. Most of us will attempt to fill the void. To this point, I witnessed myself binge watching a TV show called "Affair". And I was watching it as a form of socialization. It was the closest to "touch" that I could muster. And loneliness comes in many forms. It shows up when we are single as the lack of touch. It shows up as resentment when we are married but with a partner who is blinded by their self-preservation. It presents as self-abandonment or rejection when we expect more from ourselves than our lives than we have invested. In other words, we feel like losers because we are not "getting the results" we want. But, this preoccupation with outcomes often results in repeating the process over and over. We become encapsulated by our disassociations and become identified with the narrative that "I'm the only one lost inside my life." This hurts so we make ourselves busy and further reinforce the existential split from creation. Now is where I tell you how to face loneliness. You must create. You must dance. You must paint. You must write. You must participate in the vital production of art. You must create more than you consume. Because creative energy always replenishes the person doing the creating. It is how we reconcile the void. It's how we make sense of life. And on a practical note, people who use drug to try to escape life have failed themselves. They become consumed by the void and treat loneliness as an enemy instead of an ally. When you intend on living life to the fullest, then you divorce these zombies. And if you catch yourself becoming a zombie, then you snap out of it through movement. Loneliness is awareness of your existence. If you deny this awareness, you deny your life. You invalidate your existence. So, the next time the ache of loneliness rises inside of your body, create. Don't reach for you lover. Don't drink alcohol. Don't get lost in nostalgia. Instead, be with yourself. Sit inside the vastness of your pure potential. Stay there until you feel and understand that the essence of life is love. Love is infinite. It is a wellspring. Breath. You will die. Rest in this fact. Loneliness is asking you to make a deeper commitment to your life. Face it. And smile. If you need guidance to alchemize pain, please reach out to me. I'm one of a few people on this planet that can help you embrace freedom now. It begins with self-loathing and feeling sorry for ourselves. Some people never graduate the early days of grieving. They get stuck in trying to maintain control by remaining the victim. But we are not going to do that. We are going to feel our feelings. We are going to talk about our emotions. We are going to say the things that might offend other people but are also important for us to stay in order to foster our dignity. We are going to grieve our losses like a pro.
BEST LIFE TOUR: How to live a nomadic lifestyle It’s so easy to make money remotely. Ass, gas, or grass, no one rides for free. In other words, if you want to travel full time and enjoy all that life has to offer, you will need income and connections. Both are pretty easy to come by. Hi, allow me to introduce myself, my name is Rebekah Freedom. I graduated with my Masters in Counseling Psychology and have run a private coaching practice since 2012. I moved from an office to having an online practice in 2015. Then I went from allowing clients to pay me $125 an hour to selling packages for four and five figures. My prices reflect the quality of service my clients receive. So, I’ve made money online for about 4 years offering coaching to clients. There are a few things you need for this to be a viable way to fund your nomadic lifestyle. First, you can’t suck at being a coach or offer bull-shit services. If you are that kind of person, get the fuck off of this page. Thank you very much. However, if you are the type of person who has done the work to put the years in to provide quality services like coaching, consulting, virtual assistant work, or computer programing, then it’s easy to build a basic infrastructure around that. The first thing to do is build a website. A simple Weebly website will cost about $500 to build. $200 of that will go to hosting the website for the year. $150 of that will go to paying for Calendly or a scheduling program. $100 will go to an SMS subscription. I recommend using community.co because it allows you to collect phone numbers and emails so you can stay in touch with prospective clients. The last $50 should go to me for an hour of my time so that I can teach you how to set up your website, how to edit it, and how to maintain your client list so you can grow your company from anywhere in the world. If it takes more than an hour for you to learn and implement this basic infrastructure, then the cost of getting started becomes exponentially more expensive. Each hour of my time spent helping my client get started becomes more precious. Why? Because a person who can’t learn to implement a very basic infrastructure is expensive to deal with. So, I might add, that to live a nomadic life successfully, it takes intelligence and the capacity to learn and adapt as well as a few other vital characteristics. If you have zero money, but have a smartphone, you can still get started. However, if you are broke as a joke, then I can’t help you. No one can until you decide to stop living that way. I’m sure “the man can get you down” but with sustained effort people break out of “the system” all the time. You can too. In any case, I mentioned broke ass mother fuckers because the people that complain the loudest do the least. And that is normally what social media drags in. However, there are those rare occasions that I can reach my target audience without using targeted pay per click ads. I prefer organic reach anyway. If you don’t know what any of that means, then it will cost you $250 for one hour of my time to teach you. Why did my price go from $50 to $250 for an hour? Well, it’s because the information is more valuable. Setting up a website is one thing. Being able to run a business using that website is another! So, before we go further, here are some pictures from my nomadic life. The visuals are worth a thousand words. I visited Florida, Tennessee, North Carolina, Georgia, and more. I think the take away from these pictures should be that I made money from my online business and used that money to travel the United States. If you want the full story, then book a consultation with me. That’s free. And if you would like to make nomadic life your full-time lifestyle I can teach you all the ins and outs for $1500 for five 90 minute sessions. Here are the basics: Get a website. Make sure people can schedule your services on that site. Make sure you have Venmo, Cash Ap, or some way to take digital currency. Also, use SignNow to send client's documents. Offer a free 30 minute consultation. Set up your CRM (Customer Relationship Management) and SMS (Sending professional materials via text message). Put the phone number from Community.co in all your social media bios. The website is how people can learn about you and what you offer. The scheduling is how they can reach you directly. The Venmo est. is how you get paid. The SMS and CRM is how you foster interested patrons and convert them into clients. That's the basic infrastructure of how to start an online interfacing platform. However, if you are going to run a business so you can travel the world or just in your country, then it takes understating these elements: 1. What problem is your service solving? 2. Who are you solving the problem for? 3. Where are people with that problem searching for the solution? 4. How can they get in contact with you and get answers? 5. What is your brand and what is your message? I hope that helps. I'm very brash when it comes to business because I've been hosed by assholes more than I'd like to admit. And you have to be able to trust who you are working with and then trust yourself to do the work. So, honestly, I'm not taking clients that won't do the work and who can't afford to invest at least $1500. But, I'm happy to offer an hour for $50 or $250 to get you set in the right direction. If you are interested in living your best life, then call me or text FREEDOM NOW to 303-917-7226. Thanks To whom it may concern,
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